Poor Little Cub

Today was not a good day in the panda world.

If you hadn't guessed by our blog name, A and I are panda fans.  While we have always had a soft spot for the furry black and white animals, our "addiction" really began with Tai Shan (aka Butterstick), the panda cub at the National Zoo in DC that we visited back in 2006.  He was adorable, playful and just clicked with us (and so many others).  After visiting the zoo, we plunged headfirst into a world of panda lovers - meeting new people, participating in forums, watching the panda cams all day, staying up to date on worldwide panda news, making return zoo trips. We loved it.  Eventually as time passed we became less involved as there just wasn't enough time in the day, but it didn't mean we loved pandas any less.

Since Tai Shan, there hasn't been another cub at the National Zoo.  (Unlike San Diego, which has seen so many cubs thanks to the amazing Bai Yun and Gao Gao match.)  Tai Shan is now an adult and living in China, but his parents, Mei Xiang and Tian Tian, are still at the National Zoo.  We had heard rumors that they could be sent back to China soon if there were no cub, which made us sad, as they were our first "panda family."

Then last week, there was great news.  There was finally a new cub at the zoo!  We were so thrilled and began thinking about when we would go to DC.  We planned on the spring so that we would be there at the time cubs are cutest.  (When they're about 6 months old, they do the cutest waddling around. It's absolutely adorable.)  There's a cub in San Diego this year too, born in July, but it's a little easier for us to get to DC.

I was watching soccer this morning and reading Twitter when I saw a tweet with breaking news that the cub had died.  It said it was news reported by the AP but I was still thinking it had to be some sort of sick joke, that someone had played a prank on the news sources.  How could a cub at the zoo die?!  Of course I had heard before of cubs who didn't make it but I never imagined that it could happen to "our" pandas.  I kept searching like crazy since everything referred back to the AP.  Then I saw a tweet from the National Zoo's official account and my heart sank.  I felt the tears coming for a cub that I had barely even seen, except for a few photos on Facebook, and didn't know at all.  I ran in to tell A the heartbreaking news - that the tiny cub that we couldn't wait to get to know and love was gone.

The more I read, the sadder the news got.  The panda lovers from the group that we had been part of were commiserating over the news.  I guess earlier in the morning people trying to catch a glimpse of the cub on the panda cam had seen Mei Xiang, the momma bear, in distress, and then the panda cams were abruptly disconnected.  After they reconnected the cameras, she was clearly still distressed, looking for her lost baby who would never return.  I won't go to the panda cam to watch that, and I don't want to imagine how that is. I know some people object to us placing such human emotions on animals, when we don't know all the details of how they think and feel, but I definitely believe that a mother animal knows when its child is in trouble and feels loss and anxiety when it's missing. I feel so awful for Mei.  I can't even imagine what it's like for the zookeepers.  This is their life - taking care of the animals and helping to keep watch over the new cub. It has to be devastating.

I don't know what's going to happen with the pandas in DC now or if we'll see Mei or Tian again (or if they'll be sent back to China). I don't know if they'll ever know what happened with the cub (since they said they saw no signs of trauma or infection). There are so few pandas in the world right now and every cub loss is incredibly sad.  Poor little cub.  Sorry that we'll never get to know you.