Happy Birthday to Me

Happy birthday to me. It's a bit surreal to me that it's already time to be "celebrating" my birthday, since I don't know where the past year went. It feels like it was just yesterday that I was passing the milestone of 30, and now we're already here.

Birthdays these days seem to cause me to reflect on life and how I feel like it's speeding by out of my control. I hate that feeling but more and more, life seems to feel that way. There's always so much to do, so little that gets done, so many responsibilities, so many pulls in every direction that any day that's not a vacation day just goes by in a blink. Is it a sign of getting old that instead of looking forward to and counting the days until your birthday and celebrating it, you're burnt out, looking backwards at days that should have been more and thinking about how fast life has passed you by?

I should be celebrating, not being a downer, I know. And I am thankful for everything I have in life. I just feel like I need to enjoy each day more and make the most of every single one. I'm not sure how to do that. But I need to start. Somehow.